postponed

until i get my boyfriend back the way we used to be, and i love him again and he treats me right. i am stopping blogging. it'll all start in november. I just have no drive to post anything about my life because well as of right now it is non existant. i sit home all day and die a little bit inside. nothing worth hearing about...so bye for a while

sometimes

sometimes i wish i had a family like this with siblings that i hung out with
and little siblings i could play with. i dont really know why but its something
i have always wanted. i love my siblings to death but i have always wanted
a family just like this.
maybe this is why i want such a big family. i want my kids to have what i didnt

Working on it

SO as the man of this relationship I decided to post something.  However I can't figure out why on earth I can't put it in the "he said" tab.  However I digress.  

She sure does a lot for me and deals with more ish then anyone really needs to.  Especially my busy schedule and whinny tendencies.  I am working on all that and am slowly figuring out how I'll make this all up to you.  Right now it starts with ROAD TRIP to get me a desk on Saturday,  I know you said you didn't want to come but little do you know you are actually coming.  LOVE YOU

my ramblings.... pay attention

this picture makes me so happy because it reminds me of our hugs and i love love love our hugs more than anything. but its most defiantly not the only thing i love. I will promise you one thing as long as you do the same in return. i will never leave you alone. that's something that i can promise forever. and thank you so much for dealing with my insanity because everyone knows i can be weird and over dramatic and ocd but its me and you don't want to change any of it and i appreciate that about you. there is one thing i ask of you, i am
absolutely one hundred percent horrible at telling everything i am thinking so always ask because i need you to know because i am not a mind reader but neither are you so you also need to tell me what you are thinking always. no bottling things up. k? k. and always know i love how passionate you are about certain things as much as i wish you weren't because it affects me but i respect that you are passionate about certain things and i have to deal with that. also i love that you would never ever cheat on me and i appreciate that because well that just sounds like a ton of ice cream and crying for me at least. i want to hold you in my arms forever so please don't make me do something drastic because its my dream to spend forever with you. and i appreciate that you are slowly helping me deal with all the stupid details of my past and past relationships thanks for being patient. also thank you for trying so hard lately. i'm about to tell you a secret so listen. i never wanted to be treated normal i want to be treated  like i am the most amazing person you have ever talked to or seen. flowers help with that. seriously. i love them. i whine and complain a lot yes i act like a child sometimes i want and need sympathy. you'll have to learn to deal with that but i also love to laugh if you have not noticed so and i want to spend the rest of my life with you happy as can be, and i need a camera to document it. oh and if you don't mind i like pda i think it shows you love me and don't care who sees it. also when i deny you i promise i'm not being mean i am saying try harder stupid so do it. one thing for future reference i want a kiss every single morning to wake up to it would make me happy.

fml

this what it looks like when the state of utah takes away your license.

my average day

i hate today. truly my boyfriend is busy all the time. and he thinks its not a big deal

but i do and i hate it i am alone all the time and on top of that he has no car.

i dont know how much more i can take

my comforter+my day in numbers

my entire life i have had a comforter on my bed
i truly do not understand the people that only
have a quilt or a blanket on their bed.... honestly
people these days. i snuggle with it because its
just so darn awesome. and i love it so much
so go and get one.

12 hours of sleep due to exhaustion from crying
3 hours of blogging and blog stalking
1 hour of facebook
1 hour of just thinking
2 hours of reading
1 hour of eating dinner
2 hours of conversation with my parental units
1 hour of a shower that was far too hot
2 hours of listening to some darn good music
then feel asleep again

dear future husband

well these used to be to an unknown person but i guess we all know who these are to now

you will never never play video games ever. because so help me i will kill you. or break all of your stupid CDs in half then hide your laptop. or divorce you we'll see which one comes first
also on that note our kids will never play video games at all. no xbox no computer games. board games are the closest thing the kids will get.
also our girl will be forced to do gymnastics and dance. no chubby kids
our boy will play baseball but he is not allowed to play football and he must become a doctor
and another thing i require a  grey kitchen just because i love that color so much. not one single wall in our entire house will be white tan or brown it is against the rules.
also we will have a to-do list that needs to be completed every friday. its how i function. i've done to do lists my whole life so now you are dragged into it too

thanks your future wife

i think i'm funny

I sing and sometimes dance in the shower. If you’re in there with me, please feel free to join in…but just know that it happens.......


i saw this on a blog called to my wife it made me laugh because i feel like it applies a little bit  to my life..

here is a tip for you take it or leave it

since you have abandoned me for about 40% of the time we could spend together this is how you will make it up to me.
1. cute texts
2. dates, lots of them
3. cute notes such as the one listed below
4. super tight goodbye hugs
5. forehead kisses, lots of those too
6. no texts that are only smileys if you dont have anything to say, tell me what you love about me.
7. random appearances at my house
8. flowers
9. more notes

my second family

sometimes i wish i had siblings. i suffice by stealing krystons, i love them.

any who! my morning (like the past few days) have been far from fun

i woke up super early and my lovely boyfriend would not text me back

it made me rather mad. his phone should probably be turned up

Back Home.

today i went back home,

by home i mean my beautiful lovely school

home of the warriors

it was good to come back

i watched our amazing volleyball team play agianst lehi

and i miss the feel of all of there games so much

i love all the people

thurl bailey also attended the game

oh and this kryston, and my super parking job

skills to pay the bill.

i miss my school sometimes i regret switching 

i miss all of my friends. and the one reason i switched isn't even there

i guess there is a lesson learned.

i want to go back home

hey dude thanks for being awesome

so you do something i hate with a passion but i sat there 

and dealt with it until it got in the way of our time then i started

 hating it and didn't want you to play. then you were complaining 

and saying you were miserable and you hated it and seeing you like that

 made me sad so i encouraged you to quit. then you did and i

 thought hey this will be good. but then your lovely family had

 to go and ruin it all and bug you all the time about

it so you always felt bad and said you regretted it which

 i don't get because last time i checked you said you were miserable.

 so whatever. you started playing again. i don't care. i'm trying my hardest 

to support you and i really am putting all my effort into caring about you and 

supporting you in football but the you bailed on our plans.

on the freaking first day i give up do what you want but i am not 

supporting you in this you could have waited til Monday to deal with this.

 so have fun champ i'll be with tyler and kryston.

oh and never ever expect me to go to your game because

 i hated them before and

i hate them now

love tay

the impossible.

so about  a month ago i was feeling really crafty and awfully productive. it made me happy (even though the boyf was out of town) but anyways. here is the dealio. i was sitting in my room and thought about this awesome lace skirt i saw a few days ago, but it was a size 3 hahahaha yeah right..... so i thought why dont i make one of my own, then i set off to the fabric store found this awesome lace and some cool cotton as the under layer. then i hit the design books found a pattern. drove on over to kryston's house and we cut the pattern then the following morning i began sewing i sewed the pleats and pinned everything together, it was coming together quiet nicely if i might say so my self. but then suddenly my sewing machine broke and i had a panic attack for about 3 hours then finally gave up on it now the pieces of my skirt are all sitting over the back of my chair in the corner of my room and its such a sad thing because i want to wear it sooooooo bad, aw shucks. one day i will finish it when i get my creative stride rolling again. anyways this is what it is supposed to look like
            .
combine those two and you get what i mean

hey babe...

                               

hey Haden i would like to say that i love you very much and i am very excited for all of our plans.

i love you and everything about you i am sorry that sometimes you doubt me and i doubt you

i am upset that we fight a lot but i know that i love you and you love me so we will make it 

through it all i want to accomplish everything with you and i wish i could find a way

to tell you all these things but i can never find a time nor the words so i will suffice with 

this blog post. 

From Him

1.  I love your smile
2.  I love how hard to get you are
3. I love how you always giggle even if there is no reason
4.  I love how even though we fight we eventually get over it
5.  I love how we go to the same school now
6.  I love how we will go to the same school next year
7.  I love how you listen to my random rants about whatever i'm thinking about at the time.
8.  I love how amazingly beautiful you are
9. I love you you always seem to make me feel good
10.  I love how complicated you are.

10 things i absolutely love-- From Her

1- cuddling :)
2-date nights
3- random kisses that will always make me smile
4- the lack of clothing in certain situations (what can i say its better)
5- good morning texts
6- my oh so adorable boyfriend, and all of our plans
7- kisses on the cheek that always give me cold chills (but i never tell)
8- his crazy determination
9- how he will always make me smile no matter what
10- the sincerity in his voice when he says something sweet